I want you to know that I really, really don't like you. I have always had a special place in my heart for Houston because there are some really good things down there....the Galleria (off the chain stores), bar-b-que and seafood restaurants, and the mostly beautiful city...but this past weekend changed my mind for good.
To say that Splash is the worst circuit party for the black "kids" is an understatement. I have been all over the country and the world and I will NEVER go back to Houston for that fucked up event. While I'm on my rant, let me tell you why I hate you Houston Splash.
1.You charged $30 to get into a hole of a wall club not once but both nights that me and my boys ventured to go out. Same club Friday and Saturday night, same crowd, $30 to get into that bitch.
2. The club was basically two big open rooms and an outside "patio" that overlooked the street. What the fuck?! No decorations, no ambiance. Just big open space. And the DJ was wack.
3.In order to deal with the fuckery that I saw inside the club, I needed to drink in order to get drunk!!! Unfortunately, last call in Houston is 2am and they stopped serving at 1:59 am on the DOT. So I had to deal with the lack of masculine eye candy at this lame club sober.(We didn't stay very long)
4. The absence of attractive, masculine men with decent bodies. I don't ask for MUCH but either Houston has NO men as mentioned above OR they chose not to go out during Splash.
5. A fashion show, underwear, swim suit show that featured 12 models and only 2 who actually looked GOOD in the clothes they were modeling. Did anyone facilitate a fitting?
6. Who auditioned the male entertainers "strippers"? Out of the 5-6 that I saw, two were attracted and only one was hot enough to get a dollar. Note to strippers: Being able to dance does not qualify you to be a stripper. You should have face, body, ass, dick and some sex appeal.
After Saturday night, I had enough of Houston and changed my flight to come back to Atlanta earlier than originally planned.
This was my first and last time going to Houston Splash. Maybe somebody from Houston will read this post and try being more creative and create something new and exciting instead of being obviously money hungry and not giving a fuck OR contact someone in Miami or Atlanta for some tips on future events.
Signed
Unhappy Ex-Supporter
1 comment:
lmao. I heard it was a definite hot-mess. Glad I didn't attend this year.
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