THINGS TO PAY ATTENTION TO IF YOU ARE BEING LIED TO...

1.) Study Body Language - when someone is lying or claiming falsities, there are almost always physical clues. For example, a stiff demeanor, wringing of the hands, a nervous sway, sweating and fidgeting are, in some cases, a dead give away. A lot of times people tend to overlook the subtleties.


2.) Probe for Details- sadly, someone who is lying will go out of their way to convince you that he or she is telling the truth, including enduring a semi-cross examination. If you seek details of the proposed truth, there are bound to be holes through the story. The devil is in the details so circle back and ask specific questions and, more often than not, the liar is bound to slip up.


3.) Refusal to Cooperate – if a person is lying, they will sometimes try to dodge the entire conversation by storming off to another room when questioned, accusing you of being untrustworthy and insecure. If a person is telling the truth, they have nothing to hide and no reason to avoid your questions. But the moment your inquisitions spark erratic behavior and refusal to cooperate, you’re more than likely not going to get the truth.


4.) Sketchy Eye Contact – people who lie hardly notice that they display telltale signs. Eye contact is one of the easiest ways to gauge if a person is telling the truth. Often times, a liar will have shifty eye contact, and the eyes will drift around the room. People who have mastered the craft, will have no problem looking you in the eyes and telling a bold face lie, and these are the people you want to avoid at all costs.


5.) Watch for Stress Indicators – when a person is stressed with the idea of coming clean and decides to take the lying route, psychologists say that dilated pupils and a change in vocal pitch are very common amongst liars. In this case, if someone is trying to convince you of non-truths, their voice suddenly shoots up a few octaves, and they look like a deer in headlights, he or she could be lying.


6.) Listen For Pauses – if someone is in a situation that calls for immediate damage control and resorts to lying, he or she will have to make up a story on the spot. While making up a story isn’t hard for some, they will pause for a beat or two to collect their thoughts and think of the next part of the lie. This is how one lie leads to many and remember to ask detailed questions.


7.) Listen and Ask Again- if you’re asking questions throughout a liar’s storytelling process, you, yourself, may tend to forget what you’ve asked and the answers given. But if you’re quiet and listening, the liar will feel that they’ve prevailed and are no longer on guard. But once, they’re finished with their story, ask him or her to repeat the story again from beginning to end, and there are bound to be inconsistencies. Be weary though, smart people lie better than most.


8.) Watch for Catchphrases – someone who wants to appear as though they’re telling the truth may use phrases like, “honestly” or “to be honest.” In other words, this person is making a conscious effort to be “honest,” which could mean everything that was said prior to “to be honest” could be a lie, or everything after the “honestly” could be untrue as well.


9.) Be Honest With Yourself - the truth hurts, and sometimes people say they want the truth but will gladly believe a lie, and this is why liars succeed. Some will willingly lie to someone who has a weakness for them, and know how to maneuver to produce the desired results. But does the story really make sense? Don’t ask questions you don’t want answers to, or get lied to. Pick your poison.


10.) Trust Your Gut - intuition is something a lot of people have learned to ignore or overlook with age. But be in touch with your inner-self; if something inside says, “this is not right,” or you get the distinct feeling someone is trying to get over on you, trust your instincts and take that as all the truth you need.