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February 10, 2011

ON BEING DIFFERENT....(FROM UNTILIGETMARRIED.COM)

All women are different. All of them. I have dated a lot of women in my time and never once was one woman just like the previous one. They’re all different. They are different sizes, have different voices, said different things, looked different, acted different, walked different, said my name different.

As a matter of fact, I can honestly say, the only thing that makes women not different from each other, the one thing that makes me say, “This woman is just like the last woman I dated” is the woman who tells me she’s different. Soon as she says that, I automatically put her in this big box of women and on the box it says “SAME”.

To be clear, I know men say it too. “I’m not like those other guys.” As a matter of fact, let me be perfectly honest and say, I said it to a friend of mine the other day when she was asking me for dating advice. I prefaced it by saying, “Look, what I’m going to tell you, it’s not what other guys will tell you. I’m different.”

So there we go, guilty. Any room in the “SAME” box for me?

But I think most men are more aware of how they’re alike too and that’s where I begin to see the differences between men and women. A lot of men will pride themselves on being nothing like the next man, but they definitely will admit some of the things they want are the same things all men want. Even a man who owns cats will admit dog is a man’s best friend.

Women, on the other hand, not so much. They all know diamonds are a girl’s best friend, but I always seem to meet a woman who wants to boast about how she doesn’t want any jewelry. Fine with us men. We appreciate any woman who enjoys the simple things, but I would never fault a woman who asked me for some jewelry for her birthday or Christmas. I don’t care if my woman said she has no need for jewelry in her life, if I bought her jewelry, she needs to act like I bought her some jewelry.

These girls who I meet at the club who like to tell me they don’t usually go to the club, give me a headache. It’s like a person standing over a dead body with a bloody knife in their hand saying they usually don’t kill people. Okay, fine, they usually don’t kill people, but guess what they just did? Exactly. So just because a woman isn’t the type of woman that goes to the club doesn’t mean she needs to stand around looking like she’s at a funeral. That’s not sexy. No man wants to be around the woman who doesn’t like to go to the club at the club. They’ll see her at, I don’t know, maybe a funeral?

I think what this all comes down to is about attitude. A woman who proudly proclaims how unique and different she is understands her actions show such qualities. Every woman who I have ever approached has some quality unique to her, and she didn’t have to tell it to me or show it to me because I saw it on my own and more importantly, I want to discover more of those qualities. I don’t want to be reminded of them all the time.

Women love to call a man out and tell him he can’t treat her a certain way because she’s not like all the other girls he used to date. What they fail to understand is the way he treats a woman is on him, and not necessarily a direct reflection of the woman he’s dating. Ladies don’t need to be concerned with the way he treated the last woman. They don’t even need to bring it up, because it’s water under the bridge. Instead, a woman needs to worry about how a man is treating her. Understand she has with him an opportunity to be treated differently than before because she is with a man who sees her like no other man does. If it turns out she feels differently, thinks her man is just going through the motions and treating her like he treats anyone else, she should combat that by doing something not many women do. Leave. Now that would be different.

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