1. When your coworker asks if you’re going to answer your phone, and since you don’t know the number you ignore it. (Secretly, you know that it’s Verizon Wireless or Sallie Mae calling from that unknown number.)
2. When they ask you if you’ll play on the company basketball team, but never on the golf team.
3. When someone asks if you want chicken for lunch, and you really do want chicken for lunch.
4. When you’re asked to speak on an issue or topic for your entire race in the morning status meeting.
5. When you forget to silence your ringer, your phone goes off in that same meeting, and you realize that you’ve had Jeezy’s “Supafreak” as a ringtone for way too long.
6. When a family member calls you and asks you for money.
7. When your coworkers think that a good time to you is being in an establishment where they sell alcohol with all white people and you’re the only Black person.
8. When your coworkers think you’re attending the company retreat in the middle of the woods with all white people and you’re the only Black person.
9. When they assume you’re the atlas of the bad neighborhoods in the city. “Hey my friend is having a party at E. 99th street, is that the ghetto?”
10. When you’re at happy hour and the drinks cost, “on the house.99” and you’re discreetly trying to order Henny,
11. When you get away with not brushing your hair or getting that haircut you’ve been needing for about a week and no one notices.
12. When your coworker references a standup by a popular Black comedian like Dave Chappelle or Chris Rock.
13. When you dance at the company holiday party and everyone stares at you in amazement.
14. When your child’s teacher calls you at work about your child’s behavior and you have to start the “let me speak with him” rant.
15. When your boss has “the talk” with you about being late and you don’t get what the big deal is.
16. When your coworkers catch you smoking a Black & Mild by the loading dock during your break.
17. When you say “pause” instead of “that’s what she said” and the only person who laughs is the other Black person in the office.
18. When you realize that you still have no idea what Nalgene means.
19. When they ask you “why didn’t you just catch a cab?” but they don’t understand you tried that.
20. When you overhear your coworkers talking about the upcoming election and how Romney is going to win, and Obama has to go.
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