I'M A MOMMA'S BOY, ALWAYS HAVE BEEN AND ALWAYS WILL BE....

AS MOTHER'S DAY approaches, I have a confession to make. Well, mavbe it's not a confession in the traditional sense. I mean, it's not a Ten Commandments-type of confession, the kind where you seek repentance. It's really not a confession at all. It's more of a declaration, a coming-out of sorts, something to celebrate and be proud of. In fact, it's a bold announcement that could change the world.

I'm a mama's boy. Always have been. Always will be. There, I've said it. Amd let me be the first to say that ain't nothing wrong with being a mama's boy.

I used to get rattled every time a woman would say to me: "I can tell you're a mama's boy. Aren't you? Aren't you?" shaking her head in disgust, raising her eyebrows, cutting her beady little eyes right through me. "And you want the woman you marry to be just like your mama."

"Why you got to go there? Huh?" I would answer defensively. "Naw, I ain't no mama's boy. Nope. You're kidding right? Mama's boy? By no means. Absolutely not. Oh no, not me."

And I'm not the only one who has run from the label. All men have struggled with the same question, and all women have taken delight in posing it and seeing the subsequent paralyzing effect it has on us, like a deer frozen by the headlights of an oncoming truck.

We have never fought this assault on the nature of our relationship with our mamas, even though we know in reality it's impossible not to be a mama's boy.

The first person we knew was mama. The first person we kissed was mama. The first person we told a secret to was mama. The only person who has always been there for us has been mama. The only person who, without hesitation, would sacrifice personal hopes and dreams for us was mama. Mama has been a father and a mother, a sister, a brother and a best friend to us, a person who has always raised us with the care and compassion far beyond her job description.

But instead of saying, "Yeah, I'm a mama's boy and proud of it," like a woman would say if she was called a "daddy's girl," men have let the negative connotation associated with the term "mama's boy" manifest itself and snowball out of control. And as we look back at what has been called "the decade of the woman"--a time when women took pride in becoming less and less like mama (even the former first lady proclaimed that she was not going to be sitting at home, baking cookies and standing by her man)--frankly, I'm convinced that it's too late for mere mortal men to fight back.

So, I have decided to single-handedly take on the challenge myself. Starting today, I will become the self-anointed Super Mama's Boy. I will be easy to spot. I'll be the guy with the "S" on his chest and the "MB" on his back (cross-stitched by none other than my mama, of course). I will be the spokesperson for all mama's boys, except for the ones pushing 40 and still living with mama, and not paying mama rent. To you guys, I say, "GET OUT OF MAMA'S HOUSE! You're giving all of us a bad name."

But for all other self-respecting mama's boys, I will take it upon myself to be there every time and anywhere the question, "You're a mama's boy, aren't you? Aren't you?" is posed. MY mission is twofold--to be the protector of the sacred mother/son bond, and to be the defender of a man's right to want the woman in his life to be like his mother.

I will arm myself with photos and a TV playing soft music and showing such scenes as a mama changing her son's diaper, playing peekaboo with him, rocking him to sleep, dressing him for church, dropping him off at basketball practice, sitting in the front row at his first school play, hugging him as he goes off to college and cooking his favorite meal, her famous fried chicken.

I realize that it's not going to be an easy battle. In fact, there may be a few casualties, and a few people could get hurt. And it could get ugly, especially when we reminisce about the times when mama disciplined her son, always prefacing it by saying, "This is going to hurt me more than it hurts you."

But I am sure this stroll down memory lane will bring any woman to her senses and give every man the courage he needs to stand up for truth, justice and mama's boys everywhere.

And along the way, I also will defend a man's right to want the woman in his life to be mindful of his needs, concerned about his happiness and excited about his triumphs--just like mama. I will defend a man's right to want a woman who will be there when he needs a hug, be there when he needs encouragement, be there when he needs advice, be there to brag about his achievements and downplay his disappointments--just like mama.

I won't rest until every woman considers mama a goal to shoot for, not an obstacle to overcome or a land mine to avoid. I won't rest until every woman stops faulting men for growing up with the perfect woman and wanting to grow old with the perfect woman.

My mission will not be complete until every young boy dreams about becoming Super Mama's Boy, and every woman concludes that being a mama's boy is not so bad after all.

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